You know that “Oh damn” feeling when you get some bad news, like when someone tells you the entire roof of your building is damaged, soggy and needs replacing? This past week, I had to deal with this in a historic building where I own a rental condo.
When I realized what needed to happen with the roof, I had a sinking feeling about having to spend all that money. I was dreading the process of getting bids and getting it done. But, what I really hated was having to go through breaking the news, and dealing with the issue, with the other owners who would have to be assessed since we didn’t have enough money in reserves. Bummer.
It seems to me that life is like a game where each day we pick a card and, we get what we get. Sometimes, we get the “same o’l, same ol'” card or we may draw a card that sends us a check from the estate of a great uncle we didn’t even know. Other times, we might pull the “have a car wreck” card and get laid up for months. One draw gets us our dream vacation; another draw and we’re asked to endure an unspeakable loss.
I have a sign in my office that says, “Everything is Going to be Okay.” It is comforting to me. I know that It doesn’t mean everything is going to work out the way I want it to, but it does remind me that however it does work out, I can make it okay and move through it.
As hard as it might seem, we can develop a practice of choosing to be okay no matter what. And the best way out of almost any situation is to just go on through it.
When we focus on being okay, no matter what happens, we take control of our inner peace. Thankfully, the issues we find ourselves struggling with today, in most cases will be forgotten by next year. Knowing that makes it easier to keep calm.
When I called the first person to discuss the soggy roof, she was remarkably sane and balanced about it. She said, “These things happen, it’s an old building and I have some money saved for things like this.” I was surprised yet comforted by her zen like attitude. She then told me that she had been bitten by a brown recluse spider, and was on major pain pills. I found myself wishing she would pass out some of those happy pills to the rest of the group before I talked to them.
Despite her altered state of mind, I knew the things she said were true, so I bucked up and made the rest of the calls. “Get it over with.” “Move on through it.”
Several days later, I got another call from Ms Spider Bite where she did do a bit of the freak-out that I had expected on the first call. Without the happy pills, her anxiety had started to kick in a bit. I just told her everything is going to be okay and it always is.