Go all Out for What You Want but Let Go of the Results

Last week, I wrote about a decision that my husband and I had to make about whether or not we would to lease our loft to film the next season of a reality TV show. This sounded exciting until they said we’d have to completely move out for four months and we’d have to move out in three weeks.

Initially, I just laughed and said, “No way, “It’s just not possible to consider disrupting our lives like that!”

You could probably tell from my post last Wednesday morning that I was already leaning towards saying yes. Many of you weighed in, and the consensus was unanimous that we should go for it.

When they first presented the idea to me, the whole thing was overwhelming and seemed insurmountable given how busy I already am. But, when I started to breakdown everything I need to do to make this happen into small steps. And looked at the various resources I’d have to get things done, it seemed doable. Crazy but doable.

That afternoon, I got an email from Marie Forleo looking for stories for a book she is writing, Everything is Figureoutable. I just laughed, because it’s so true everything is figureoutable.

To see what Marie was up to, I followed a link to her Oprah Souper Soul Session and then read the comments. There was one woman who monopolized the thread by saying that this concept was a lie. She didn’t believe everything was figureoutable as evidenced by the fact that she has tried for years to be an award-winning actress and it hasn’t worked out.

It reminded me of a time in my twenties that I was devastated over a broken engagement. I moped and carried on way too long.

One day, I was walking with a guy friend with a long-time history in Al-Anon. I said to him, “It’s so sad that this relationship didn’t work out.” He turned to me said, “Don’t worry Judi, it’s going to work out.”

I looked up astonished. “Really, you think that It’s going to work out?”

“Absolutely, it’s going to work out. . . ” He paused, “Just not the way you thought it would.”

That was one of the most crucial life-defining lessons I’ve ever had.

We can only do our part and then we have to turn over the results and then figure it out again, and again. That’s life. No one promised that we’d get everything we want. In fact, how boring that would be.

Sometimes, we might actually get something even better. I’m so glad that my engagement to Ambivalent Guy didn’t work out the way I had wanted it to.

Although I have no idea how this adventure of ours will turn out, it’s definitely, figureoutable.

Once I decided to say yes, the steps have unfolded like magic. I got a contract Friday night. Someone put me in touch with an entertainment attorney in my neighborhood who has negotiated the terms with the production company, to work for all of us.

The owner of a three-bedroom house with a yard, right around the corner from us, agreed to a short-term lease, including our two dogs.

Next week, the high-end movers come. They’ll pack everything up, take what we want to the new house, set that up for us and put everything else in storage.

So, although I’ve figured out how to make it work, for now, I have no idea how it’s going to work out. And that is indeed the essence of an adventure.

Life would be pretty dull if we won every game we played. We have to figure out what we can, we’ll get the results we get, and then we’ll figure it out again. Rinse and repeat.

I’d love to hear your stories about how these ideas have played out in your life.

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